Sunday, July 1, 2007

Wo-men....

Bhujodi, Gujarat 29/07/07

I often wonder what makes the flesh and skin of a woman so special that has to be either cautiously wrapped from head to toe because ---it is so special, or exposed to draw million eyes because--- it is so special.
Whether a fully covered Savitri next door or a Mallika on stage they both highlight the ‘speciality’ of a female body either covered or exposed. They both lead female to the same status of pleasure commodity…through different names, used-unused.
Its being said prostitution should be popularised to stop rape. Some more Mallikas added to the other pan to keep the pan of Savitris intact, so that a male has no inadequacy picking one for pleasure and the other for marriage.
And its the females shifting at this beam balance for ages, for a male is a static being. They are widely accepted and granted in their fixed status forever, despite their age, knowledge, wealth and education that rarely bring a change.
A girl is well fed from her teen with the advice, ‘he is a guy he will do so, you are a girl, its you to protect.’ So keeping the ever accepted hunter and the hunted concept in mind a good girl needs to be careful with her existence not to excite a man, lest if she is raped the world may say…‘Poor fellow, he is a man! You ought to have been disguised instead.’ Burkhas, ghunghats, dupattas all dragged and pinned by a girl to help these poor fellows help themselves and yet a little girl in her nappies fail to escape.
Its only female flesh and skin that matter perhaps.
A man can roam with his shirt open and nobody questions against comfort, they can urinate most proudly with their birth-rights approved in every street with an exposure more casual than taking breath and none has a word to oppose.
But a girl of course has to be packaged well.
And I however see only two solutions to this. One by law other by nature. One preventing rape and other accepting it. One in which a rapist can be beaten in public till his scotrum peel off and testes drop to ground and other in which females would also commit rape. The concept of rape will then be diluted and balanced if a time is fetched when a man has to wrap and pin a pleated cloth carefully around his waist in the fear of being sexually harassed by a female. Well, may be this would start the march towards un-civilization by the females too to reach the males.
So what? What good has civilization done to us anyway?

11 comments:

Gautam said...

Gross exaggeration. Not everything is true. Not all men look at women as objects of pleasure only. This is a typical radical feminist outlook towards life. That women have all the sorrows and men have all the joys. That all men are devils and all women are angels! That women are infalliable and men are all rascals. The concept of 'Burkha' is restricted to certain sections of society. It is my guess that it came about because sexual arousal in men is much faster than in women. In men, the arousal is very fast, a mere thought of a sexual part of a woman is enough and the sexual arousal ends much sooner than women. In women, sexual arousal is much slower and is conditioned by certain things like emotion, liking of the person etc. Once there is sexual arousal in a woman, it takes a long time to end. If men were all to be dressed up revealingly, not many women would indulge in molestation because women don't get aroused to random men on the street. Men are different and women are different. They are made differently. Hence, the reason for 'purdah' could be (It is my guess) because of this reason. It does not mean that women are slaves! Even in nature, by and large, the male species makes the first sexual move. It is then responded by the female.

aparajita said...

@ gautam
Thanks for your comment. But what you are defending upon is exactly the thing that has caused the root to this problem---- the ever accepted attitude that a male has weaker grip and a female takes time to indulge. This excuse leaves no guilt in a man even after such a heinous crime.
Well,the following lines are from the comments to a topic in Times Of India at http://o3.indiatimes.com/mytimes/archive/2007/06/24/4650626.aspx

'All the fault lies with women, I recently raped a teenage girl but due to my political clout and money power i was able to escape procsecution.

But I dont blame myself b,coz that teenage girl was wearing a mini skirt so I was not able to control myself when I looked at her beautifully shaped bare legs.

well I think that girls wear mini skirt just to attract men so it was not my fault and no body can blame me.
Posted by Vosty @ 6/28/2007 8:13'

I do not believe the fact men are made this way and women in that. Lets not put all blames to God and wash away our hands from responsibility. Things have evolved through time, generation and practice. And there was a time before the so called civilization when women had multiple sexual partners and were aroused in no time. The society then suppressed them as it grew and females under the male dominant society were forced to have more grip over their sexual desires. Men however were left free. And if this is an excuse today I am afraid God cant save the world even if He sends all 10 avtars together this time.
A female before indulging in an open sexual act would think because the society is shaped in a way which would laugh, frown, criticize and punish. Her worries of the consequence is able to kill and subdue her sexual desire at that point. And if the thought of a harsh punishment rings in the cells of a male when his uncontrollable ever forgiven desires trouble him I am sure that painful thought would also subdue his generous testosterone with quite an ease.

gautam said...

i guess it all depends on one's perception about women....

and about the flesh and skin part, just imagine how would it be to live in a world where everyone was nude....people will no more be interested in the " physical part" and while talking with a woman, the man will always be looking in the eye and talking. ....bcos he is no more interested in the something that he is used to seeing everyday.....interest is created only if something is hidden...

the only way to solve probs related to " how women are looked upon or treated" ....is an higher level of understanding and consciousness...

Purusha(male-pure consiousness) + shakthi(female energy) ====> ananda( eternal bliss)

in the end...a man cannot live with out the woman.... all the seven( actually 9 ) chakras, also known as the seven yonis are nothing but 7 female energies.....

to reach the cosmos, the man needs a woman and vice versa....

"once the man starts thinking, he'll start seeing...life is after all......simple"

awareness and consciousness are the two key words to the solution....

hope i've written something relevant to ur topic

tc....
Gautam Madhavan Nair

Dipali Banerji said...

Well Aparajita what u said is all true..... but as every coin has two sides, it's true for all walks of life. Fidelity is not a slave of gender biaseness..... A woman can also be equally fidel.... or else u won't see women sleeping with their bosses to get that "out of turn promotion" or women involved in extra-marital affairs. Hey let's give the men a break...... they are not as devilish as they r projected....

Now on the other side of the coin, yes i agree that right from the childhood a girl is fed with the notion that she should always cover herself lest the men will become excited & harm her. I guess rape is the only crime on earth where the victim is punished (by the society) rather than the guilt. It is the duty of every civilised human to control their animal instinct. No one can go away with these lame excuses of men being different from women...... The only concrete solution to solve this is by changing the mindset of the society, which however, will take it's own time. The solution suggested by u that women rapist should be bred is not so commendable..... As the saying goes- "an eye for an eye, leaves the whole world blind"

Now the truth that is crystal clear is that woman were, are & always be the source of attraction...... female's body is used to sell anything from soap to car..... from movies to daily soap operas.... Such is it's power. After all "poori duniya husn ki diwaani hai"! it is our area of strength & not area of weakness. rather than fighting for the proposition of "equality" why not celebrate this difference. We are in reality much powerful then the other half of the population.

runtodahills said...

hmm so is prostitution wrong and is being. but then the cunts (read feminists) say that women should be free to do anything. if a woman becomes a prostitute of her own free will is there a problem with you?? u hate all men-pleasing activities dont you. stripclubs, porn, prostitution etc. but you are pissed when some women choose to do it and then you say 'they have a right express their sexuality'. tell me why do u feminists send mixed self-contradictroy messages??? once and for all tell us is pornography misogynist or a womans freedom of sexual expression.

anyways these feminists give exaggerated extreme examples from highly conservative society to support their claims. anyone would agree that women are opressed there. but where is the liberal society heading. towards misandry. why do u want the tables to be turned in the modern liberal society in urban areas? here its the mens sexuality thats suppressed. women can do anything here.

tanmoy said...

I just wanted to understand aparajita has gautam's comments born any relevence to u..What i understand from the way u ve expressed yrself contrast that with response to Gautam, that the article had really shocked u to the extent that made u react strongly ..u felt the urge to bring the fire out...and this was momenatary and definitely not a persitent burning anger or hate against a specific culture or something perhaps that was the only reason, someone who has so much of depth neither can be a feminist, a cunt or anything..atleast I cant beleive..perhaps we are living in a world with so much of gross disqualifications..that we though can feel sad,angry..but their are certain truths we can not ignore and this rape is not only happening physically..it is happening mentally.at a mass level...subtly...which I find more destructive.....whatever it be...still the world is not such a bad place to live..there is mysery , true..but there are good things as well like some of your shoots...

aristotlerocks said...

century old regulatons on human relations continuing without a debate. but now that women have begun to speak they have begun to identify themself as an independant individual there is a change. change is slow but there is a change. lets not be bothered about preserving our cultur/civilisation or destroying it. but yet what are we going to gain by violence. RAPE. is a violence a terrible violance have to be stopped but how. defenitely not by violence. the solution lies in the history of the change that has happenned so far. the solution is very simple. but it needs to be worked by all members of the society from all corners. what you sow in the cradle grows in the adult. let us not seperate our children has boys and girls. let they have a common school let parents and teachers teach them that boys and girls are first human beings. they should co exist and care for each other. they should respect each other. when this begins to happen the idea that the women are for sex will die. law is not a panacea for all evil in the soiety. if law can reform, if law can prevent, if law can do any thing then there would not have been any crimes in the society. our country has soo many laws but law has to work through the persons who hold them. it is the paradigm that actually works. so let us work to change the paradigms. the law will defenitely help us.

Raghav said...

You seem to be generalizing the issue with all men. Not all men have such beastly qualities. I agree that women are seen as objects of pleasure and gratification by many men. But there are good guys too (may i dare say like me) who feel for ill-treated women. The solution to this is that women should stop hiding inside their cocoons and act with self-confidence. Do not fear to walk on unlit empty streets. If any man dares to make a pass at you, kick him in his balls. If all this doesn't work and unfortunately u get assaulted. see to it that u and ur family take the matter to the police. The main reason why such things keep happening is that rape is not reported for fear os shame and so the rapist becomes bold and torments other women.
Lastly, i feel women are also responsible in some way for forcing other women to be very conservative and forgo their liberties. It happens in my family too. My mother has been very interfering in my sister's life since my sister reached puberty. She is not allowed to wear tight dresses like tube tops and tight jeans. My mom always insists on salwar kameez with the dupatta pinned to the shoulders. My sister is always given lectures on how to sit properly, walk properly and how not to attract attention.

Manu Akula said...

Hey ! Thats a great idea.

Come on, women of the world, unite !

Grope men before they grope you !!

gautammd said...

Well thought & written ,well balanced too ....just a line to comment

" All the Living Beings give it their Best Try to make Use of their Strengths & Weaknesses to achive / secure what they want out of their lives....through Illusions & Realities...the fact being that its difficult for a common person to understand & differentiate between the two....those who are able to are called Realised those who dont continue to seek Realisation through this journey of Illusions & facts ...but every Soul is surely destined for same thing for sure ....its only the Time taken that matters ....& thats part of Karma..........

Vivek said...

Aparajita, reading your post and the comments I can say your observations are absolutely correct and just. My comment is not to give any undue leverage coz I don't know you personally. Still as a human being I can feel the pain and anguish that reflects in your post, and remember I am a male with all virility imparted by testosterone running in my blood and I am equally potent too. At the same time I do feel what you feel since I have conscience that guides and keeps me objective and unbiased. Not all men be rapists but no doubt women and sex are always something that hovers in the minds of men. Women are objects of fantasies and naturally speaking there is no harm in fantasizing within limits. The root of the problem is that men don't enjoy the act of rape instead they relish the dominance achieved through it. For most of men sex is nothing but masturbating inside a vagina and nothing can be pleasurable if it involves only one side. Rape and molestation has nothing to do with veil or revealing dress rather it is with mind that tries to prove dominance and superiority. Sex is about freedom and the woman should be as free as man to choose his partner, deserve all right to say no when she doesn't want to indulge. In today's world everything has become just commodity and instant gratification is the day's order. Moreover women have somehow been accepting the discrimination thankfully, leading to a vicious circle. Legalizing prostitution can not be an answer to rape rather the need is stringent deterrent not less than capital punishment and awareness to fight against injustice. Its imperative to act proactively, not waiting first to get raped and then fight. What we need is empathy and resolve to stand for justice together.