Sunday, January 6, 2008

Rapes...strength and beauty

In my room, NID, 13/01/08

I don’t read newspapers. I have tried a lot though to put on the habit but its not the BJP or Congress that catches my eyes though marked in bold. A small group of words trying to fit itself at a corner somewhere… many times after being headlines now tired of showing its same old status…of a schoolgirl molested by teacher or a careless girl raped by a mob with so small font-size and so little space makes me a pessimist for the whole day. And women committing suicide for dowry if told to a kid as a bedtime story every night would also complain of being nagged.
So lets talk of something fresh. Of Mumbai girls being molested on new year? That’s old too. Celebration means fun of course! And don’t girls know god makes sun rise and set to mark them in and out? Then why move out at night?

Well, I was not afraid of the world I had entered on puberty…not when I slowly found men in light stood in perspective, in dark they seem alike… as I felt empathized by Taslima when each time I faced a situation I had earlier dealt in her book. She was my teenage hero, my courage and inspiration. She was another side of my life which often fought with Vivekanand saying, “Vairagya? That’s a man’s business…poetic carelessness is a man’s fashion. We have other battles to fight beforehand!”
And she was beaten up!
A news of the day I didn’t dare to read.
She was threatened, beaten and perhaps would be killed very soon.
People ahead of time are not given their space. Space-Time-equation is one dimensional that way.

Well, I have joined a karate class recently… not hoping I could neutralize some acid poured on my face someday or avoid the sudden wish of a happy new year…but thinking I have a body so am responsible for its strength and was shocked to see no girls there. Physical strength is so much a man’s attribute! And the funny thing is most of the attacks are made keeping your groin in protection which we too follow, though a girl might need some other standing posture which might protect her better. A fighting technique has also developed keeping men as attacker in mind. Nobody has thought of a girl being a fighter beacuse a weak, meek and sick girl is called beautiful. She would be measured with tape and handed over a crown, and for her protection somebody else would go to gym and be called manly.
And I feel the entire concept of dominant and dominated have a common thread here, of subconsciously being aware of the high contrast in physical strength. Its quite natural that a bigger dog would want to bark at a feeble one and lets not fool ourselves anymore thinking we are far from beasts. And the hardest truth is --the weaker pays. At least among beasts they are clear with the concept of strength but so many years have gone by with so many civilizations and we either went round and round with colorful frocks to be showered with coins, either mastered the art of glance to lure a man for immemorial verse or dangled around a pole like a fool and felt overjoyed.
A man can be so much easily harassed than a woman. One kick can bring the sun, moon and stars together crumbling on earth. Then why is it only women who are harassed everywhere?

Well, enough of blaming the men, enough of blaming the law, enough of troubling the mathematicians who calculated the rape rates and made curvy graphs every year! And above all enough of meek and sick love poems cherishing weaknesses as the attributes of women. We will define our own beauty...purely curved out of strength…yes, mental, spiritual and Physical!

And let the crimes be worth dealing after all! A man attacked by many women or a woman attacked by many men on a lonely lane one night…for this let the police toil for days…let the detectives think for nights and let the newspapers be brightened with good story.
But a girl with a body but no strength...confronted by a normal man with normal body oneday, who smiled and whistled and finally pulled her scarf and she was scared and screamed...and cried and ran as mad....
Come on! Let’s not insult anymore!!!


Tushar Kapila said...

"And the funny thing is there are stances where you block or strike keeping your groin in protection"

thats for men to protect - attacker can be anyone.

and it is common knowledge that men are the more violent of the sexes. also that they are more prone to crime - biological and social aspects. anyway all the best with ur karate ... if u quit that always walk/ run - keep fit!

vijay said...

It was wonderful reading ur thoughts. Specially the part of sun, moon & stars crumbling etc. which is quite funny & also true. Men being stronger or women weaker & meant to obey etc. is only a matter of conception. i also feel (i dont think u would believe) is both men & women are equal. However in view of the present senario, it is on the women to make their presence felt, come out of the mindset and as u r doing learn karate, self defence rather attacking techniques to have their rightful place under the sun.

ur pics r good but ur thoughts are beautiful. keep going strong.

A. I. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
A. I. said...

It is sad when one human being has to fear another, suspect another. Why can't there be mutual respect...self respect even. Which self respecting man would force himself on a woman? Sad..for a man who can't find a woman who'd want him..than shame for a woman that a man uses a woman( once again) to somehow satiate the brute in him.

Also if only the SHAME factor is removed for the WOMAN/ VICTIM from the whole pre/post RAPE scenario, there would probably be fewer men trying to SHAME a woman this way.


Nikhat said...

Beautifully articulated thoughts!
Though the laws are becoming stringent by the day, not only rapes, but all forms of assaults are occuring everyday.
Out of the blue a man comes and hits a girls with a stone slab and beaks her skull for talking to a boy. (This happend in Hyderabad a few days ago). And what can the girl or any passerby do? But take the girl to the hospital and the man to the PS. But the harm is done!
Mere passing of the laws will not solve the problem and even if the woman is trained in martial arts, what can she do when she is talking to a class mate and out of the blue, acid is thrown on her face or she is hit by a stone or knifed?
The problems lies in the minds of the men which needs to be sensitised.

CresceNet said...

Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my site, it is about the CresceNet, I hope you enjoy. The address is . A hug.

Partha said...

“Then why move out at night?”
Yes, then they will ask, why wear cloths like this, then why not wear the bourkha, then why drive a car?

Many a times, I have seen that the rape victim is blamed for seducing the rapist. Even for this Mumbai Girls molestation case, Bal Thakaray said that they wore almost nothing!

Some people think that if a woman has revealing cloths, they must be easy to get. If a jewelry shop shows its products to the street people, does it mean that they are free? Does it mean that the robbers that broke in the shop are innocents turned to criminals?

Not only the blame, why people make such a fuss over rape victim. She hides in shame..why? And that is why uncountable stories of molestation remain buried.
Rape is just a horrible crime. Do we hide in dark if a thief broke in our house last night? But strangely, the victim here seems to be the offender. And to crown it all, Islamic countries have laws that punish rape victims.

ad said...

Why are women always haressed. why are they always considered the weaker sex. why are they always considered as a comsumable rather than a life.
For me all these were sentences wich i never bothered about. till the day i met you i never even thought about such issues. i considered them as a point of intrest for social workers and people like tasleema. the bell rang when i saw your deep inclination towards such issues. i never realized when it started happening that i also felt a rage and anger for such issues or say the male sex.
the day came when i started making my opinion after getting influenced and nurtured from you. but it was so fluctuating and baseless that i got disintrested and stopped thinking about such issues. or say because theses issues were so much talked, i started percieving them as normal and boring....the same way as i consider BJP congress RJD matrix.
to revisit and rethink them , i would go spontaneous and freaky to make the whole situation intresting. one is all the men and women of the world should unite and make a pact which undersigns their co-harressment. or to make it simpler, it should be the birth right of every men and women to haress each other.
or the women should surender and offer their souls and minds along with ther bodies to MEN.
or the men should be massacred through the most painful ways by the WOMEN. i feel relieved.

Anonymous said...

Unlawful assembly, years with incidents of women being raped on trains and harassed in crowded buses, it seems as a daily agenda for a daily “rag” reader. It’s true that sexual assaults have increased so much; we don’t know what to do...whether to sympathize with the wounded, mentally wounded physically wounded and curse the rapist, take out a rally which would even more embarrass the victim, headlines in newspaper, blurred footage, torturing journalists, what else be more painful than this, yes if you are very strong and can face the world with a stern face then bravo, it is very easy to say but when it happens you wont have time for a second thought., or the best part throw away the newspaper and get back to work.
If you still yearn for fight for the privileges for women, open up an anonymous castration center, catch hold of the entire rapist community, perform a castration on them and chuck them to some rehab center, for a sex free peaceful verve.

Souvick said...

Its not just rape..not just sexual orgy ..its over all looking down on Woman in disrespect,the age old men domain of considering women inferior, using natural physical poweress to confide woman. Religious books like Quoran are making the situation even worse. QUoran is giving the license to kill to half of the population of the world.

Rajtilak Bhattacharjee said...

dear appy,although i dint go through your profile on orkut throughly,i did go through your blog.i usually go through blogs cause i am a blogger myself and i love to write.honestly i dont know how much literary value this post have,yeti must say it contains one things thats hits you on your face.and thats truth.i am a man,and i am a self-confessed chauvinist.still i would say some ideologies of men needs to be most of these cases we are wrong.







RD said...

Very well articulated thoughts..
At times staunch feminists are misunderstood.The reason being,inability of the society to accept the newly brought freedom of expression an individualism to the females..
Well,way to go girls..
Women do not need to be and attacker as when they will start attacking,men wouldn't be able to protect ..

Anonymous said...

good one abt da rape thgs wic is vry unplsnt n young girls r all da tym victim ....kep on writng hpin see mre